Films i saw this Month (from crappiest to greatest)

Original Poster
Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 29765


January 2014

55th

The Vengeance of She (1968)
A beautiful young European girl, Carol, is taken over by the spirit of mysterious Ayesha, queen of the lost city of Kuma. Carol is taken to Kuma to succeed the almost-immortal Ayesha as empress of Kuma.
1/10
Trailer

54th

Day of Resurrection (Uncut) (1980)
(AKA Virus)

A military-engineered virus, released during a plane crash, kills the entire human population. The only survivors are scientists in Antarctica, who desperately try to find a cure and save what is left of the planet from further destruction.
2/10

53rd

Ice Station Zebra (1968)
Commander James Ferraday, USN, has new orders: get David Jones, a British civilian, Captain Anders, a tough Marine with a platoon of troops, Boris Vasilov, a friendly Russian, and the crew of the nuclear sub USS Tigerfish to the North Pole to rescue the crew of Drift Ice Station Zebra, a weather station at the top of the world. The mission takes on new and dangerous twists as the crew finds out that all is not as it seems at Zebra, and that someone will stop at nothing to prevent the mission from being completed.
2/10
Trailer

52nd

Overdrawn at the Memory Bank (1985)
Raul Julia plays Aram Fingal, a very intelligent computer programmer and a very bored man in the employ of Novicorp, a mega-corporation that exists somewhere in the future. When caught watching "Casablanca" at his desk, Fingal is required to undergo rehabilitation therapy called "doppling." Doppled patients find their minds transferred into the bodies of animals for a new outlook on life (and for a number of amusing nature documentary sequences narrated by Julia). However, Fingal's body is misplaced and he is transferred into a computer while the body is located. With the help of Appolonia James, a medical technician played by Linda Griffiths, Fingal manages to reprogram himself into a simulation of Casablanca and eventually gains access to Novicorp's financial computers, bringing the company to its knees. But Fingal's real problem is getting back into his body before his memory patterns are erased.
3/10
Trailer

51st

The People That Time Forgot (1977)
(AKA The Cleavage We Never Forgot)

A sequel to The Land That Time Forgot. Major Ben McBride organises a mission to the Antarctic wastes to search for his friend (Doug McClure) who has been missing in the region for several years. McBride's party find themselves in a world populated by primitive warriors and terrifying prehistoric creatures, all of whom they must evade in order to get back safely to their ship.
3/10
Trailer



Feb 1, 2014 10:00 AM
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Red
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 59141
Please tell me you watched the MST3K version of Overdrawn.
Feb 1, 2014 10:06 AM
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 29765
Red;20782565Please tell me you watched the MST3K version of Overdrawn.


No
Feb 1, 2014 10:11 AM
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Red
Joined: Feb 2004
Posts: 59141
Feb 1, 2014 10:12 AM
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 29765
50th

Rampo Noir (2005)
4 Stories
Mars Canal - Within absolute silence, a naked man wanders through a dark and depressing landscape recalling the excruciating details of his last encounter with his former lover.
Mirror Hell - When a series of women are discovered with their faces burnt and skulls charred, a young detective investigates, discovering that a unique hand mirror is always found at the scene.
Caterpillar - A war hero returns home with no limbs and only his eyesight remaining. His beautiful wife, tired of taking care of him, turns to torturing her crippled husband for amusement.
Crawling Bugs - A sexy actress is returning home from a successful night on stage, until her limo driver decides that she should be coming home with him.
4/10
Trailer

49th

Not Forgotten (2009)

Set in a Tex-Mex border town, Not Forgotten is a classic psychological thriller about Jack and Amaya Bishop, a couple who must come to terms with their tortured pasts in order to save their kidnapped daughter. It is a tale taut with intrigue and steeped in Latino mysticism, where the line between what's real and what's imagined becomes hopelessly blurred.
4/10
Trailer

Trivia Chloe Moretz voiced the entire character of Penny in Bolt (2008) before Disney hired Miley Cyrus to do the part.


Feb 1, 2014 10:17 AM
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 29765
48th

Slave Girls From Beyond Infinity (1987)
Lovely and resourceful Daria and Tisa escape a space gulag only to crash land on a nearby world where a guy in tight pants named Zed is playing The Most Dangerous Game. Zed turns the girls and another guest loose in his jungle preserve to serve as the prey in a mad hunt. Armed only with knives and their wits, the girls must battle their way accross the jungle to a hidden arms cache before Zed catches and kills them.
4/10
Trailer

47th

The Guilt Trip (2012)
As inventor Andy Brewster is about to embark on the road trip of a lifetime, a quick stop at his mom's house turns into an unexpected cross-country voyage with her along for the ride.
4/10
Trailer

46th

Insidious: Chapter 2 (2013)
Renai is interrogated by a police detective about the supernatural events in the house. While the police investigate the house, the Lambert family temporarily moves to the old house of Lorraine Lambert. Renai is haunted by a woman in white and Josh has a strange behavior at home. Meanwhile Lorraine seeks out Elise's partners Specs and Tucker expecting to find answers.
4/10
Trailer

Trivia
The Paramount marketing department were so certain that Barbara Striesand would gain a Golden Globe nomination for her performance in The Guilt Trip, that not only did they put out an ad congratulating her victory, but posted it online moments before the nominations were announced, only to be swiftly pulled when Streisand ended up without the nod.
Ouch!!!



Feb 1, 2014 10:46 AM
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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 12905
So that's where Aram Fingal got his name from? Interesting.
Feb 1, 2014 10:54 AM
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 29765
45th


Justice League: The New Frontier (2008)
Adapting the award-winning DC Comics miniseries DC: THE NEW FRONTIER by Darwyn Cooke, Justice League: The New Frontier spins a tale of the DC Universe in the 1950s, focusing on test pilot Hal Jordan (Green Lantern) and the Martian Manhunter. The story also features other DC characters, including Barry Allen (the Flash), Superman, Wonder Woman, Batman, and many more.
4/10
Trailer

44th

Balls of Fury
(2007)
Down-and-out former professional ping-pong phenom, Randy Daytona, is sucked into a maelstrom when FBI Agent Ernie Rodriguez recruits him for a secret mission. Randy is determined to bounce back and win, and to smoke out his father's killer -- arch-fiend Feng.
4/10
Trailer

43rd

Ivanhoe
(1982)
(AKA Sauna of Man Lust)
This is a remake of Walter Scott's Ivanhoe. Ivanhoe, a worthy and noble knight, the champion of justice returns to England after the holy wars. He find England under the reign of Prince John and his henchmen and finds himself being involved in the power-struggle for the throne of England. Will justice prevail and will all fair ladies in distress be rescued?
5/10


Feb 1, 2014 11:09 AM
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 29765
42nd

The Odd Life of Timothy Green
(2012)
After receiving bad news from a fertility doctor, Cindy and Jim Green try to bury their dreams of having a child by writing out all the great traits their child would have and putting them in a box in the garden. During a freak storm in the middle of the night, they awake to find a boy named Timothy, with leaves growing from his ankles, standing in their kitchen calling them mom and dad. Cindy and Jim are thrown into the midst of parenthood and over the coming months, Timothy will teach them more than they could have imagined about being parents and raising a child, no matter how he comes into their lives.
5/10
Trailer


41st

L'ange Noir
(1994)
In this stylish French drama fits well into the film noir genre. A visitor comes to the home of Stephane, the wife of an important magistrate. She, claiming attempted rape, calmly shoots him. The visitor is the legendary gangster Wadek Aslanian who was beloved as a latter day Robin Hood. Stephane's husband hires a lawyer, Paul, to defend her. Paul learns many disturbing things about Stephane's sordid past when he starts receiving anonymous letters describing her exploits which included prostitution, performing in porno-movies, and most interestingly having a liaison with Aslanian. The judge is ignorant of his wife's past. Despite her dark and mysterious past, Paul cannot help but fall in love with Stephane.
5/10
Trailer

40th

The Stendhal Syndrome
(1996)
Anna Manni is a policewoman trying to capture a vicious serial rapist and killer. The problem is that she suffers from "Stendhal's syndrome", a psychosomatic disease that gives her dizziness and hallucinations when she is exposed to the sight of paintings and artistic masterpieces. When the maniac lures her into a trap inside Florence's famous Uffizi museum, her troubles are just beginning...
5/10
Trailer

39th

A Black Veil For Lisa
(1968)
When a narcotics detective finds out that his beautiful wife--who is an ex-criminal--is cheating on him, he hires a professional hitman to bump her off. However, things don't go quite according to plan.
5/10
Trailer



Feb 1, 2014 12:15 PM
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 29765
38th

Once Bitten
(1985)
The Countess has a problem. She is a 400 year old vampire who will cease to look young unless she is able to feed on a virgin three times before the upcoming Halloween, a week away. She sends Sebastian, her servant and all of her lesser vampires out to find one. Finding a virgin is difficult in 1980s Los Angeles. Mark has a problem. He wants to 'do it' with Robin in the worst way, but she wants to wait. Jamie and Russ, Mark's goofy friends convince him to go to a Hollywood pick up spot where Mark meets the Countess, on the prowl. Robin's not going to understand this.
5/10
Trailer

37th

School of the Holy Beast
(1974)
After the mysterious death of her mother, a young woman chooses to enter a convent to find out what happened. As soon as the door closes to the nunnery, the nuns start torturing the woman. Also, the woman has to deal with a God-hating archbishop and a lesbian mother superior.
6/10
Trailer

36th

Escape Plan
(2013)
Ray Breslin is the world's foremost authority on structural security. After analyzing every high security prison and learning a vast array of survival skills so he can design escape-proof prisons, his skills are put to the test. He's framed and incarcerated in a master prison he designed himself. He needs to escape and find the person who put him behind bars.
6/10
Trailer

35th

Blitz
(2011)

Detective Sergeant Tom Brant who is dispatched to take down a serial killer hell bent on killing off the police force one by one. "The Blitz" manages to slip through the grasp of Tom every time, and with the precious lives of his colleagues diminishing one by one, Tom is led to the question: if we can't protect our own, then what good are we?
6/10
Trailer



Feb 1, 2014 12:36 PM
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Joined: Oct 2002
Posts: 13709
Films I saw in January, from crappiest to greatest:

Bells a.k.a. Murder By Phone (1981)
Nebraska (2013)

I only watched two movies.
Feb 1, 2014 12:59 PM
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 29765
34th

Like Minds
(2006)
(AKA You Pout, I Pout)
The forensic psychiatric Sally Rowe is called by Detective Martin Mackenzie to analyze the profile of the teenager Alex Forbes, who was found in a train station holding the body of his schoolmate Nigel Colby and with powder in his hand. Alex discloses his relationship with Nigel, who believes that they were descendants of the Templar Knights, and how Nigel used the power of his mind to control him. Mackenzie believes that Alex is the killer, but Susan investigates the family of Nigel under pressure of Alex's father, and finds that all of them belong to an ancient and powerful secret society.
6/10
Trailer

33rd

Raped on the Beach
(1971)
A young girl witnesses a violent and ultimately fatal act between her mother and another man and it emotionally scars her for years to come. As a young woman, she takes a vacation with a more worldly girlfriend to Sardinia, and in doing so, attracts the attention of a young man in the village. Despite her interest in the man her haunted past prevents her from developing a normal relationship with him.
6/10

Trivia
Toni Collette (star of Like Minds)
At the age of 11 she showed her phenomenal acting skills when she faked appendicitis out of boredom and longing for attention; her act was so convincing that doctors had to remove her appendix, even though the test showed nothing wrong with it.
Feb 1, 2014 1:04 PM
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Joined: Sep 2002
Posts: 30705
School of the Holy Beast is fantastic. Your rating is way too low.
Feb 1, 2014 3:34 PM
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Joined: Apr 2010
Posts: 8028
Ice Station Zebra is the only film I've seen so far. Pretty average.
Feb 1, 2014 3:37 PM
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 29765
32nd

Death on the Nile
(1978)

During a luxurious pleasure cruise down the Nile aboard a lavish vessel populated with wealthy passengers, widely despised heiress and home wrecker Linnet Ridgeway (Lois Chiles) is murdered. Also aboard is famed Belgian detective Poirot (Ustinov) and his taciturn traveling companion, Colonel Race (David Niven). Poirot undertakes an investigation into Ridgeway's killing. Among the colorful suspects are Salome (Angela Lansbury) and Rosalie Otterbourne (Olivia Hussey), Doctor Bessner (Jack Warden), Mrs. Van Schuyler (Bette Davis), Miss Bowers (Maggie Smith), and Jacqueline De Bellefort (Mia Farrow). As more bodies pile up, however, it appears that nearly everyone aboard has a motive.
6/10
Trailer

31st

Pain & Gain
(2013)

Based on the true story of Daniel Lugo a Miami bodybuilder who wants to live the American dream. He would like to have the money that other people have. So he enlists the help of fellow bodybuilder Adrian Doorbal and ex-convict, Christian bodybuilder Paul Doyle. Their kidnapping and extortion scheme goes terribly wrong since they have muscles for brains and they're left to haphazardly try to hold onto the elusive American dream.
6/10
Trailer

30th

The First Time
(2012)
A romantic comedy centered on the two high schoolers: Dave, who until now has pined for a girl he can't have, and Aubrey, a creative type who's dating a guy who doesn't quite understand her.
6/10
Trailer

Trivia
Mia Farrow (star of Death on the Nile) has 15 children. She has three biological children with André Previn: twin sons Matthew Phineas and Sascha Villiers (born February 26, 1970), and Fletcher Farrow Previn (born March 14, 1974). She adopted three children while married to Previn: Soon-Yi Previn, Lark Song and Summer Song (aka Daisy Previn). She has one biological child with Woody Allen: Satchel O'Sullivan Farrow (now known as Ronan Farrow', born December 19, 1987). She adopted two children while with Allen: Moses Farrow (aka Misha), Dylan O'Sullivan Farrow(aka Mallone). She has adopted six children as a single mother: Tam Farrow, Isaiah Justus Farrow, Quincy Farrow (aka Kaeli-Shea Farrow), Frankie-Minh Farrow, Thaddeus W. Farrow and Gabriel Wilk Farrow. Tam Farrow died in March of 2000 at age 19 of a heart ailment. Lark Farrow died in December of 2008 at age 35.


Feb 2, 2014 5:46 AM
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 29765
29th

The Mysterious Castle in the Carpathians
(1981)
In the 1800s, a baron, who is the owner of a castle known as The Devil's Castle and who is also an obsessed opera fan, keeps the body of his favorite diva preserved in a crypt in the castle. In order to keep away potentially nosy visitors, the baron's mad-scientist assistant, invents all sorts of spooky phenomena in order to give the castle a creepy reputation.
6/10

28th

Down By Law
(1986)

DJ Zack and pimp Jack end up in prison for being too laid-back to avoid being framed for crimes they didn't commit. They end up sharing a cell with eccentric Italian optimist Roberto, whose limited command of the English language is both entertaining and infuriating -but rather more useful to them is the fact that Roberto knows an escape route
6/10
Trailer

27th

Big Ass Spider
(2013)
A giant alien spider escapes from a military lab and rampage the city of Los Angeles. When a massive military strike fails, it is up to a team of scientists and one clever exterminator to kill the creature before the city is destroyed.
6/10
Trailer



Feb 2, 2014 6:09 AM
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Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 12905
If anything, I think you underrated Timothy Green. Not much on whimsy, but that one worked for me.
Feb 2, 2014 9:17 AM
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Joined: Mar 2003
Posts: 5143
What didn't you like about Down By Law? I thought it was damn near perfect, and yet you have it tied with Big Ass Spider. :p
Feb 2, 2014 9:44 AM
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 29765
Arnie-ism;20783411What didn't you like about Down By Law? I thought it was damn near perfect, and yet you have it tied with Big Ass Spider. :p



Take away the B/W and the sexy use of contrast and your left with a film about absolute nothing!!

The non famous of the three can't act, in fact Tom Waits can't act but no one will ever say anything cause he's "Tom F**kin' Waits Man... he doesn't act, he happens" the only one who can act is Roberto and he acts irritating.

Them finding the italian woman was ridiculous and i almost took my own life at the "You scream I scream for Ice Cream" segment

RumbleFish now theres a artsy/indie B/W movie :up:
Feb 2, 2014 11:39 AM
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Joined: Jul 2006
Posts: 29765
26th

The Berlin File
(2013)
A North Korean agent in Berlin is betrayed and cut loose in the midst of a financial espionage intrigue. Together with his wife, a translator at the North Korean embassy in Berlin, they try to escape being purged, as North and South Korean operatives relentlessly pursue them.
6/10
Trailer

25th

The Flu
(2013)
The worst epidemic ever seen is sweeping through Bundang, the suburb of Seoul. After smuggling illegal immigrants into the country, Byung-woo dies from an unknown virus. Soon after that, the same symptoms are plaguing scores of residents in Bundang. People are helpless against the airborne disease and the number of infected increases quickly, spreading chaos. As the worst-case scenario precaution, the city of half a million people, just 19 kilometers from Seoul, is about to be sealed off. The government orders a complete shutdown. Meanwhile, infectious disease specialist In-hye and rescue worker Ji-goo go into the closed city to find the blood serum of the index case, a crucial part of developing the vaccine.
6/10
Trailer



Feb 2, 2014 3:07 PM
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